Maria didn’t expect to become her sister’s guardian. “We were only two years apart,” she said. “But when the dementia progressed, someone had to step in. And it had to be me.”
What followed was more than legal filings and signatures. It was a journey through emotional terrain, balancing family loyalty with hard decisions. Maria managed doctor appointments and financial paperwork. She made choices about housing and treatment. And through it all, she found clarity in her purpose. “She always looked out for me,” Maria said. “This is how I honor that.”
What Adult Guardianship Really Means
Adult guardianship is a court-sanctioned legal role that allows one person to make decisions on behalf of another who can no longer manage essential life responsibilities on their own. These responsibilities might include making healthcare decisions, handling finances, managing legal affairs, or choosing a safe place to live. The reasons for incapacity vary from Alzheimer’s and dementia to mental illness, traumatic brain injury, or severe developmental disabilities.
According to the National Council on Disability, more than 1.3 million adults in the U.S. are currently under guardianship, and that number is expected to climb as the population ages. By 2030, nearly one in five Americans will be 65 or older. The need for thoughtful, compassionate guardianship arrangements is only growing.
When Guardianship Becomes the Only Option
For many families, the shift begins with subtle changes. A missed mortgage payment here, a lost prescription there. Maybe there’s spoiled food in the fridge, or the house isn’t as tidy as it once was. Sometimes it’s more alarming a minor car accident, a scam phone call that results in lost money, or a fall that requires hospitalization.
Maria noticed that her sister’s stories didn’t quite add up. “She told me she had paid her bills, but there were eviction notices on the counter,” she said. “That’s when I realized she wasn’t just forgetful. She was no longer safe.”
These seemingly isolated incidents are often signs of a bigger picture: a person who is no longer able to navigate life alone. The National Center for State Courts has reported that financial mismanagement and exposure to scams are among the top catalysts for families seeking guardianship. And with the CDC identifying older adults with cognitive decline as particularly vulnerable, the decision to intervene becomes about protection, not just paperwork.
Why Guardianship Shouldn’t Be the First Step
It’s important to know that legal guardianship is one of the most restrictive forms of intervention and should be treated as a last resort. When a person still has mental capacity, families are encouraged to explore less invasive options.
A durable power of attorney, for example, can allow someone to make healthcare or financial decisions on another’s behalf, while still preserving personal agency. Living wills and advance healthcare directives can guide future choices in case of illness or decline. Even joint bank accounts or Social Security payee arrangements can offer practical ways to help someone manage without involving the courts.
However, once cognitive capacity is lost, these options are no longer legally viable. That’s when families often find themselves navigating the court system, not because they want control, but because they have no other path forward. According to an AARP report, 60% of adults over 50 have no formal advance directives in place, leaving families unprepared and emotionally overwhelmed when crisis strikes.
The Legal Road Ahead
The process of becoming a guardian is not a quick or easy one. It usually begins with a medical or psychological assessment to prove that a person is incapable of managing their own affairs. Once that documentation is submitted, a formal petition must be filed in court. There’s typically a hearing, sometimes involving a court-appointed attorney to represent the interests of the person in question. If the judge agrees that guardianship is in their best interest, a legal guardian is appointed and given defined authority, often with limited or full control, depending on the case.
But the responsibility doesn’t end there. In most states, guardians are legally obligated to submit regular reports to the court, detailing medical decisions, financial accounts, and any significant life changes. Some courts even require home visits or third-party reviews. It’s not a set-it-and-forget-it duty. It’s a sustained commitment that demands attention, organization, and care.
How the Right Legal Support Can Help
For many families, hiring an elder law attorney makes all the difference. These professionals specialize in the legal and emotional nuances of aging and family caregiving. They can help determine if guardianship is truly the best option or whether another arrangement would suffice.
Maria credits her attorney with keeping her steady throughout the process. “She didn’t just explain the legal stuff—she got what this meant for me emotionally. That made a huge difference.”
The National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys offers a searchable directory for finding qualified professionals who understand both the law and the human side of aging.
Life After the Court Date
Once guardianship is granted, the real work begins. It can feel like taking on a second full-time job. There are prescriptions to fill, appointments to schedule, bills to track, and tough decisions to make. But there are also moments of closeness: reading mail together, taking walks, sharing quiet meals.
Anthony, who became guardian for his 84 year old uncle after a stroke, said, “I didn’t expect to feel so connected. But it reminded me that caring for someone doesn’t end when they stop being able to ask. Sometimes, that’s when it begins.”
A survey by the National Guardianship Association found that 80% of family guardians describe the role as both challenging and deeply meaningful. Most said they underestimated the administrative complexity, but also the emotional reward.
A Role Rooted in Care
Guardianship is not for everyone. It requires time, clarity, resilience, and often a thick skin when family dynamics get tense. But for those who take it on, it can be one of the most profound expressions of love.
Maria puts it simply: “She raised me in so many ways. Now I get to help her live with safety and grace. That’s love.”
As more families face the realities of aging, the conversation around guardianship will only grow more important. With the right support and open hearts, it doesn’t have to be a burden; it can be a legacy.
Written by ZestYears Contributor Alisandra Medbery Snyder
Sources:
National Council on Disability, “Beyond Guardianship” Report (2018) – www.ncd.gov
National Center for State Courts, Adult Guardianship Court Data and Trends (2022) – www.ncsc.org
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Older Adult Safety – www.cdc.gov
AARP, Advance Care Planning Survey (2020) – www.aarp.org
National Guardianship Association – www.guardianship.org
